There are many ways to make love, and it’s interesting to watch the levers you can activate, from 0 to 100 :
- Energy from 0 (cuddle and no movement) to 100 (ecstatic fast ending)
- Words (from 0 – a silent intercourse, to 100 – a conversation sex session)
- Time (from quicky to three-days non-stop dance)
- Giving (from “I give” to “you give” and all shades between)
- Tenderness (from 0 : technical ways kama sutra exploring, to 100 : eyes, words of love and attentive caresses).
I’m sure you will find dozens of others dials to watch, risky or not, with or without music, with or without light, etc : the “consenting adults” concept is very powerful, opening doors and paths and windows, destroying inner and “rules” cages.
Today I’m examining the Tenderness Agreement. It’s very soft and sweet. It can exist between husband and wife, or friends, or exes, or siblings, three people, anyone. It’s an agreement, which means you freely both DECIDE (you’re adults, right?), that it’s “only about that”.
Invent your own rules, then :
Underwear only. Skin, but no more. Spend a night together, or one hour. Whatever : you decide before. Cuddling. Caresses. Nothing more. Just being together, listening, breathing, soft caressing, no more. A night, an hour, whatever. It’s about tenderness. “I care”. There are SO MANY ways to say I love you, right? Sex without “sex”. Yessss you can.
So I go back to the levers I wrote at the beginning, and with my partner-of-tenderness (“la tendresse”, en français), we choose. Slow, no light, few words, one night, hands and kisses, keep underwear, tenderness. Then, go to bed, skin touching…
It can trigger some desire? So what? We have an agreement, right? No intercourse and no touch of some strategic places, as we said. It’s interesting. Listen to breathechanging is good. We will respect our agreement.
Or not. Whatever.
Thanks for reading!