Deparkerization?

I work in a bookstore where someone recently asked me about the Parker wine guide.

I answered with a bit of surprise : nobody asked me that in years! I checked and realized that the last Parker guide, in France, was from 2009.

We asked ourselves about how nobody seems to care anymore about Parker.

I remembered the “problems” at the time : the guy was giving notes to wines (from 0 to 100), and he was so powerful (or such an influencer) that wine makers around the world had begun to twiddle their wines around to satisfy him. And the higher notes made some wine unaffordable. And in France we have a suspicion about notes, the idea of “evaluation gives a digit”. Especially in Arts and human activities. Etc.

In fact, there were many “controversies”. The “Mondovino” documentary ( https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0411674/ ) tells a bit about them…

If a wine is Parkered 67/100, is it better than a 63/100? Really?

This leads to many structures :

  1. The fact that Parker used digits to “note” wines was a problem in itself. Therefore we could note movies, poems, maybe love, why note? “This poem is a 88/100 and my wife is a 76”. Can we do this and why?
  2. Parker was powerful and listened, and when he titled a book “Bordeaux, The Definitive Guide for the Wines Produced Since 1961”, the impact was huge. What is a “definitive” ranking?
  3. Why is someone a star of an influencer at one moment and pretty much nothing ten years after? What about the stars we have today?
  4. What about “controversies”? Should we listen to the cons, always? How to study their arguments?
  5. What does one do with “Mainstream Tastes”? Do we jump happily in the pool of obedient followers? What is mainstream in a small world of specialists? Why do people follow, and who are those who don’t and try to find less frequented paths?
  6. What is social pressure when it’s activated by an influencer, a critic?
  7. If there a “Number One Influencer”, who’s the second (let’s rank the rankers, bim!), and the third? What if we compare them, organize ideas fights?
  8. What about the minority of the “last followers”, the believers? What if they were right?

Then, again : where to apply and think with these tools? Photography? Movies? Fashion? Anthropology?

This article made you think about other people? Who?

Thanks for reading!

Thanks for reading!

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“This is how it should be done: lodge yourself on a stratum, experiment with the opportunities it offers, find an advantageous place on it, find potential movements of deterritorialization, possible lines of flight, experience them, produce flow conjunctions here and there, try out continuums of intensities segment by segment, have a small plot of new land at all times.”

Gilles Deleuze

On what foot will you dance? What if in a situation you don’t feel what you’re supposed to feel?

Being neutral, or hilarious, at a funeral. Feeling nothing after being fired. Laughing when you read a drama book. Crying in front of a comedy.

What if in a situation you don’t feel what you’re supposed to feel?

  • It’s surprising for people around you, which means there’s a social pressure, right? You are “supposed to”.
  • It’s surprising for you.
  • Or maybe you exactly know why you react “out of the frame” – but it’s a secret.

 

In “A Streetcar Named Desire”, a woman visits her sister in New Orleans, who lives with a violent man (Marlon Brando). You’re “supposed to” dislike a man who beats a pregnant woman, right? But Brando is so good (and he’s a movie character) that you begin to love him, then you hate him, then you admire his work as an actor, then… Vous ne savez plus sur quel pied danser : “don’t know what foot to dance on” – You don’t know where to stand.

And this is made on purpose.

 

What are situations when you don’t know what to feel, where to stand? Manipulation? Sudden truths? Out of focus? What triggers feelings-confusion? Are you tired? What is this gap, between what you feel and what you’re supposed to feel? What if it was wrong? What if your radar needed to be fixed… or other people’s radars??

 

Thanks for reading!

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Pressure & Sabotage, a cessation process

Family. Three kids. Pressure inexplicably put on the eldest boy, who is labelled “brilliant”. “He will become a doctor”, as they proudly say. In the middle of his curriculum, he has a motorbike accident. Or develops an invalidating disease, like sclerosis. As he was not strong enough to say “No” to this pressure, he found another way to stop.

It probably sounds “too easy”, and the accident was just maybe random, but I heard that kind of story so many times that it became really fascinating. So for me it became a dial gauge to watch :

When too much pressure, watch for the accident life will invent to cease it

Pressure can be provided by family or spouse, by the situation, or by… people themselves. When people work too much, sometimes their friends begin to say : “Hey, you’re pushing too far, slow it down, pal!”. In general, they don’t stop. And then you see what life will choose to make them stop.

They suddenly fall apart, have an accident, they become sick. Life brakes for them. From time to time, it’s not even enough! They insist, they don’t understand, they move forward, so they fall more sick or they curiously get hit by a car saying : STOP, for Christ’s sake!

You, my reader, are a reasonable person, but you know… that when you’re VERY upset, light bulbs often explode when you switch on the light. PAF! It not truuuue, it’s impossible, but… it happens all the time, though.

The same way, I saw many times the house stopping people. Too much pressure, too much stress, and there’s a huge leak in the bathroom, a falling chimney, or a fire. The environment is acting silly.

Nooo, can’t be. Right?

Thanks for reading!

 

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Instagram : leahminium

Unsteadiness, Propositions & Expectations : Life!

I’ve known someone who expected people around her to be :

  1. Steady
  2. Without any pressure
  3. Without expectations

It was really like an Instruction Manual!

I explain her… expectations :

  1. If you say you’ll doing something, you HAVE to do it. Steady. You have no right to change your mind, or to adapt to events, desires or possibilities. STEADY like a sh*t in the fridge.
  2. It is forbidden to ask. Propositions are considered nasty. Because it’s “pressure“.
  3. Don’t have any expectations (which are “pressure”, of course). You own brain is considered useless, or boring, and therefore will not be considered.

So I’ve have been a complete mess next to this person! Because :

  1. I’m not steady and I will never be. I make mistakes, I change my mind, I meet other people with desires. Things happen. Reality is complex and moving. I adapt. I am not steady.
  2. I have a brain and I use it, so I love propositions! If I feel close to someone, I feel free to tell what I think. I expect a dialog, and a person able to say “no”, but also “yes”.
  3. I – of course – have plenty of expectations, because I’m alive. I am not a king, but there’s no queen around either. Equality is interesting. In certain situations, I expect something, yes. I don’t understand why I shouldn’t, too!

 

A few dials :

  • In fact, I don’t even know what pressure is… Human beings I’m in relation with, have questions, propositions, ideas. I dance with them. Or not.
  • The idea of pressure means you COULD be pressured. Which is absurd, between adults. Unless you feel weak, nobody should be able to pressure you (exception : your manager, and the law).
  • If you’re used to obedience, any living human interaction will harm you.

 

What, or who is really like this? :

  • Steady
  • Without any pressure
  • Without expectations

A zombie, a robot, a valet, or a dog. With communication skills, but in a certain way only : obedience (and understanding what you’re asked). There’s an instruction manual, right? Just follow. Be strong. Or run.

Thanks for reading!

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Fleeing Pressure the Wrong Way

A clever kid! His parents want him to be the successful guy of the family. He will become a doctor!! He studies hard, hard, hard, under pressure, and… gets Multiple Sclerosis – or a motorbike accident.

Pressure! There are so many ways to pressure someone. Orders. Injunctions. Work.

There are many ways to shunflee strong moral pressure. If you’re a strong adult you just accept it fiercely, or you quit, you fight, you learn detachment – you protect your mental territory. There are so many ways to resist discreetly : sabotage, inner resistance, sarcasm, preparing revenge or a funny stunt. Escaping ways…

If you are a child, if you’re weaker than the pressure-provider, if you are stuck or prisoner of the situation, you can’t resist.

Then your body takes over.

Your body will find a way to say stop. Can’t stop the source of pressure? He’ll stop you!

Nervous breakdown. Burn-out. Accident. Serious disease. Somatization. It’s just a burst of resistance, and a full stop, most of the time. Against moral pressure, the last shunning way to say “fuque off”.

Tool/dial : Watch yourself. In both ways.

 


See also : “Be Spontaneous, please”


 

Thanks for reading!

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