The quality of time has been modified 

The quality of time has been modified

Like a sudden change in the light

Look around you, now

The present is full of shades

The past resuscitates  – or goes very far

The future is now impossible to measure

When does this happen? Sudden proximity of death? Pregnancy? War? Love? A splendid new idea, a project?

What is lost? Why? Can you do as if nothing happened? Will you live differently? What does it trigger? What is possible? What do you want : use this new light? Find back the old one?

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Your Special World / Your Special People

“Some people make the world more special just by being in it”.

Obviously, with a rainbowed butterfly, it’s an “inspirational quote”, probably about love, right?

You can also think about stars (who said Marilyn Monroe?), or people who “really” changed the world, from Lincoln to Churchill. Inspiration.

I like to think about other ways to consider it….

Maybe it’s about someone who appeared and really changed you for good, and forever. A mutation, a growing up process. By the way, it’s maybe your spouse, now! Or it will be :

“The world is more special with you, I want to keep your around…”

 

Maybe it’s about someone who has been in your life and is now gone. A father who died, a lover who chose to let you down. This person is not there anymore, but you are – and you will always – think about him or her this way :

“What would he (she) think about that?”

 

Therefore, the colorful butterfly trick is maybe accurate. Some people ADD colors to your life, to your brain, right?

What about yourself? Do you think of someone who’d say that about you? Yes? No? Why?

 

Thanks for reading!

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“I chose you for your weaknesses” – #Pina

Aurélie Dupont is a well known French ballet dancer who performed with the Paris Opera Ballet as an Étoile. She is now the director of dance for the Paris Opera Ballet.

 

In an interview she says that in one day, as she was working under the direction of Pina Bausch, the German choreographer told her :

“Okay, you’re a very tough woman, you’re a very tough dancer, but I’m sure you’re very sensitive, and that’s why I chose you, and I want you to show me this. Because your strength, your force—I don’t care. I want to see your heart.”

Aurélie shortened it for the magazine’s interview :

“Do you know why I chose you? For your weaknesses. This is what I want to see of you”.

Oh my, this is a good seed, right?

 

The main question is :

What is the balance, in Pina’s brain, between

  1. I really want to see her weaknesses
  2. I have to say this to her, as a coach, to crack her toughness as an ambitious dancer.

 

This leads to another set of questions :

What is this state, when you’re almost at the point “to discover yourself”? What do you need, then? Another person? An accident, something which stops you until you discover your last step? A sentence you read somewhere, or hear? A friend? A surprise?

When you’re tough, hard with yourself, with the goal to be flawless, why do you always meet a point where you realize it’s a wrong way up?

Why do I always go back to this pattern, which is : when you’re stuck, your next path is maybe to find and develop ANOTHER FACET of you, which is often the contrary of you?

 

Mme Dupont was tough and very good. But Pina revealed something to her : you’re great, but now show us that you’re weak too, that you have a heart under your perfection.

 

Thanks for reading!

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Instagram : __bodylanguage__

 

 

 

Zodiac : lazinesses or challenges?

This is just a microthing about Astrology. If you think Astrology is nonsensical, you should not read that, it could bore you a lot, et j’en serais fort désolé…

We all have our ways to consider Zodiac. From 0 to 100, you believe in this or not. This is not my point here. It’s just about this question :

You were born one day, therefore you’re a Cancer, a Virgo or a Capricorn, etc. What do you do with this? How do you use it?

  1. Do you use it in sorry statements, to be lazy, like “I’m a Taurus I’m slow, you know…”?
  2. Do you use it to feel challenged, knowing your strengths and weaknesses, to become a better person?

I talked longly one day with a person who knew this field pretty well, who told me about people’s “Birth Charts”, with this smiling sparkle in her eye : some people with perfect harmonious charts were having terrible or failing lives, and some others with… complicated charts were living an interesting, challenging life.

Naaah you can have fun and say this is a good proof that all this is bouleshit for bored ladies. This is not kind! Stop that, I’m blogging! 🙂

In a way, who cares, after all : my pleasure here is to go back to the questions and the 1/2 pattern I am asking after them…

Dials : What, in our days, could be our Big Statement Bouleshit Mistakes? When do we say “I’m like that and I can’t change”? Why? What if we began to play “Unpinning Mindsets”? What if… sometimes… we needed to stop saying “I don’t do that, ever”?

Thanks for reading!

 

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Instagram : bodylanguage

Teeth & Tidal Waves : Dangerous Dreams

Jünger wrote somewhere that some dreams are so intense that they seem to warn you : “Pay attention, please”.

Two dreams are dangerous : when you loose your teeth, and tsunamis. Death and danger.

But when you dream about someone’s death, everybody seems to agree it’s not about death but about CHANGE (you will change, you have to change, you need to change, whatever).

If you dream this person died, some people say your relationship with this person has to change, but I disagree. I think that our brain works about us only, therefore that our dreams use the traits this other person personifie to show a need of change for yourself.

Well, we could go on like that for pages. I’d like to add this :

Thanks for reading!

 

 

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From Quarrel to Joust : Elevation process

When your couple needs to fight, you argue. You can stay at reptilian or prehistoric levels : you scream, play flying plates & slamming doors, scream louder, or you can try to move the cursor up.

If your quarrelsome mood – oh what a great word! – needs to unfold, there’s are some wrong ways up like becoming sarcastic or using bad faith, stupidity or violent communication (one define the other : “You’re like your mother”, “You’re lazy”), silence icy treatment or using poor innocent third parties (the kids?).

I propose to rise from these low levels of arguing. Of course you can use Reason. If you know Transactional Analysis you can begin to dissect your communication and try to put it on “Adult -> Adult” mode. That’s OK! Think. Or ask a intermediary (not your mother-in-law!) to play the diplomatic card.

My purpose here is to imagine another “Right Way Up” : Jousting. It’s a change of mood. You fight… with a smile for the other. It’s a sparkling competition. Emulation is the key. It can become a game. You can really invent rules like : “You can’t speak until you waited two minutes in silence after I did, I’ll do the same”, or “Argue on both sides of a table… with pen & paper” (find your own rules).

Jousting is a clever way to quarrel. It’s like when you play chess with a friend, emulation is the key. You want victory but you help your opponent to climb too.”Right Path Up”. Finding solutions… and at the same time satisfy your need to fight. Joust!

 

Of course if you read my blog you know that there’s a pattern here, a tool for other situations : Elevation. When and where (and how) do you realize that you’re on a low level? Gaiety? Entertainment? Sex? When you’re in a useful place but you should maybe stop, think and push a lever. Which lever is it? Subtlety. Right?

This pattern is described here : https://afrenchtoolbox.wordpress.com/2015/08/07/a-matter-of-levers/

Thanks for reading!

 

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Instagram : such_a_pretty_crazy

A Way of Being in a Hole : Inventing Dawn

There are many ways to deal with depression, darkness, and feeling you’re stuck in a hole. You can cry alone, find someone who can help, you can complain, you can stay silent, you can think, you can fight to find your light, you can try to invent sparkles, you can be sarcastic, or become crazy, you can feel hope, or despair, you can wait, you can kill yourself.

Or you can invent your dawn.

Well, yes, it’s a feeling, or a decision, I don’t know. You’re in your dark hole like a forgotten filthy dog. Maybe you receive (or invent) your calling – it’s time. Maybe you just decide to move not your ass but your spirit.

You clean your sky from old squeaky moral rules, from guilt. You clean the pessimism. You want to increase your knowledge like a minstrel, a knight, a free spirit. Your refusal is joyful. You can almost guess and feel some new delights.

Rebirth. Convalescence. Regeneracy. Transition. A smell of new territories and above all : a new way to explore.

Jump out! You go girl!

Thanks for reading. Have a nice day!

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