“L’écart entre le réel et l’espéré” : The gap between the real and the hoped…
When the gap is too wide, what happens? We drift.
Drifting is boat vocabulary. You can say you’re out of gas. Or you’re stuck. Parked. You’re powerless. Whatever.
Drifting means you have no steam and you let go. Maybe you watch. Maybe you wait. Maybe you think. Drifting is interesting. Be angry. Or zen. You could get lost… That’s maybe cool!
If you know the 4 laws of action when you have a problem, when you have a gap between the real and the hoped :
- You can go away. No gap any more, because the hope has gone.
- You can change the way things are. New boat. New rivers…
- You can change your hopes. Invent new ones.
- You can just shut up – and accept the gap.
Meantime, drift. Wait. Quarrel. Drown. Insist. Watch. Endure. Actualize.
You have the right to say no to “Don’t forget to smile”. Drifting people who fakesmile on their boat look like lunatics!
Stand up, though. The horizons could signal.
OK. There’s always hope : Remember to smile back, one day!
Have a nice day!
If you’re a creative person, you encountered the “Fecundity of Limits” concept, obviously. Fruition. I’d distinguish :
- the limits you choose yourself
- the limits given to you by someone in charge
- the limits you encounter while you’re building your stuff.
Choosing your own limits is such… a pleasure. It’s about preparing your work. Paint something with 3 colors only. Write a book in a month. Travel, but no more than 5 miles a day.
Limits coming as instructions can be a relief. Many actors talk about the freedom you have while you have to obey strict orders. It’s about unfolding inside a frame : perfect for certain personalities.
The limits you encounter are parts of the building process. Your technical shortfalls is a good example. You then move forward “within” your capacities – trying maybe to push them back. The budget can be a limit. You’ll discover the others while you work : It’s a stream, a current!
Tool : Choose, change them, ask someone for limits (as seeds), think about them while your create, and then… forget your feedback : you’re in the flow, a good one!
Thanks for reading! Work well! Travaillez bien !
When I was 25 I complained to a friend of mine who was 40, a painter. I was composing music slowly and in a bitter way because I was missing instruments, equipment, etc. I had a Macintosh, a mic, a synth, a reverb and a flute.
In art or life, sometimes we feel stuck, therefore we don’t do anything, because we “miss something”, we don’t have enough of this or that : we just wait, bored like a lonely koala in the taiga.
So we just “watch a goal”, a state or a line where, at last, we will be able to begin.
THEN we will have enough time, enough money, enough energy to do it!
I will… paint, compose, be happy, invent, write, blog, learn, the day I will have this or that, blah blah blah…
This is procrastination, laziness & threnody. Sometimes it’s useful to wait, though…
My friend told me I was silly, and, as a painter, that if she only had a pen and paper she would work. “Do something with your flute and your keyboard, instead of complaining, silly!”.
Okey. Watch around. Pick up a tool. Begin. To begin : begin, as they say. Now. That’s true!
…unless you don’t work for another reason, using this syndrome to do nothing. Rhoooo this is baaaad!
Instagram : taranewton1
When someone you know says something dramatic or excessive, there’s the possibility to be more dramatic, to unsheathe swords and cut your partner in two (or three, ouch).
Or else, you can use these two lovely words : defuse and forestall. Add a smile, a pair of kisses on forehead, and a few kind words, and hopla, done!
You’re funny, were you out of your mind or what?, let’s forget it, come here you silly!
A few days ago I talked with an aged funny married couple, who explained that they have two divorced daughters, in their thirties, complaining that they don’t find any suitable guy to date.
Both told me something like : “OK, the guy must be : handsome, interesting, wealthy, great in bed, protective, obedient, kind-hearted, with feminine qualities, while giving them big space when then need it”.
“Where is my Prince?”
Then they finished by : “Well, my dear, this kind of wealthy valet doesn’t even exist!”.
Who knows, though? How to lower expectations in love or marriage? What kind of doors/choices are dancing here? Can we cross out some qualities in the list? Why? What if the wealthy valet type says “No”? Why would men be frightened by such a program?
By the way, is “to make do” really a verb?? (question from the French). I found :
“We’re striving to make do with less”.
Bonne journée !